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jealousy rides with me.
20 February 2011 @ 09:28 pm

I left town for a few days/got busy with midterm studying. But I am making up for that now! Up to day 5.

Day 3: Drugs and alcohol
So...drugs. I don't really like them (pot makes me paranoid/hallucinate, and that's the only recreational drug I've ever tried), and as a consequence I don't do them. I have friends who do though and enjoy it -- and in general my friends are all smart enough to have their habits in moderation and don't get themselves in any truly stupid shit. I don't judge them.

As for alcohol...I like it. I drink moderately on a somewhat regular (maybe once a month? if that?) basis, as in a couple of shots at the one party I go to in a month. I've only been drunk enough to throw up once (my birthday) and with any luck that won't happen again -- though I know my friends have other plans for my 21st birthday. :P I prefer drinking in moderation as opposed to people getting shitfaced everywhere, and as it turns out I tend to keep friends that drink the way I do, too.

I'm lucky enough that I haven't had any family history or problems with drug abuse or alcoholism, which is nice. I can't imagine how awful it would be for someone whose life has been a lot more adversely affected by either one. If that was the case for me, I'd probably feel much differently about it all.

Day 4: Views on religion
I'm agnostic. I don't believe in the Christian god exclusively, or in the Bible. I suppose it stems from reading Greek and Norse myths my entire childhood, but in my head I tend to picture the powers that be as a community of gods - that very well may include Buddha, God, and Zeus - that have their way with the world and each other. The deities in my mind have flaws, much like the Greek gods do. I figure there's some cosmic power up there, but he/she/it/they are too clever to let us truly pin down who they are or what they do.

Day 5: A time I thought about ending my own life
I was depressed through a lot of 8th grade and the beginning of high school. It wasn't until my senior year that I got really comfortable in my own skin -- and even then, I felt incredibly alone in the world. My closest friends had both found significant others (that they'd been dating for years) and I felt pretty abandoned. And the stress of school really got to me. But I think it was worst around 8th and 9th grade, and I can't even remember why. I just remember that I felt like the most worthless human being alive, and that I actually thought it would be better if I just wasn't around anymore.



I'm still not caught up (lagging one day behind) but I'll fix that later, when I don't desperately need a shower / need to study for midterms.

:)
Tags:
 
 
feeling: fullfull
listening: Edith Piaf - La Vie en Rose
 
 
jealousy rides with me.
16 February 2011 @ 10:36 pm


Day 2: In ten years' time...

I'll be 30 in ten years. Oh god.

I would like to have my higher degree(s) obtained and taken care of by then. I'm aiming for a PhD in some kind of immunology bioscience in the next six years or so...we'll see how that goes. I'd like to be married by then, should I be so lucky. At the very least, I really hope I'm not single at 30. I don't know whether I'd want to have kids yet -- ultimately, that would depend on my financial situation, and my employment situation. If my work and bank account allow it, I'd love to have a kid by then (and more than one, in the future).

Other than that, I'd just like to be happy. I'm not picky about where I'll be (though knowing myself, I'll probably be close to my family somewhere), and as long as I'm not living out of a cardboard box I'll be content.

Ten years is a really long time to be looking ahead. It's a little terrifying to think that's half of my whole existence up to this point...
Tags:
 
 
feeling: sleepysleepy
listening: Solomon Burke - Cry To Me
 
 
jealousy rides with me.
15 February 2011 @ 05:25 pm


Last meme = failed. Let's try again! Hopefully with less disastrous results.


01. Current relationship

I've been with my boyfriend for 5 months (proof of how long it's been since I last updated -- he has never been mentioned here!) . It's amazingly refreshing to be in something long-term. We just had an awesome Valentine's Day involving the SF Symphony, a singing Valentine gram, and amazing presents (he got me calligraphy ink and unreasonable amounts of chocolate, I got him a Cal-colored periodic table tie and lightsaber chopsticks). So, life is good.

I guess the best thing about being a stable, caring relationship is the security, which I'm not used to. He's not going to just run away, and we're good at talking things through with each other, and we're honest. It makes for a relatively problem-free and easy relationship. And I get along well with his friends, and he gets along well with mine. We've met each others' parents and siblings, too.

We don't have the most dynamic or exciting relationship, but sometimes I don't think that's such a bad thing.



Happy Belated Valentine's Day!
(I've taken up calligraphy. :P)
Tags:
 
 
feeling: stressedstressed
listening: Florence + the Machine - Bird Song
 
 
jealousy rides with me.
03 September 2010 @ 01:52 am
I am tipsy-updating. Which may or may not be a good idea. But I have cause to celebrate! :D After horrible schedule mix-ups and being dropped by a lab and turning into a total stress monster, I can now say that I have a perfectly functional schedule and I GOT ACCEPTED INTO A LAB. With an infinitely cooler postdoc to work under and really awesome lab research. I have moved on from mice over the summer to bacteria! Woo. I feel nerdy about being so excited about having a chance to sit in a lab all day.

Okay, that is all the awesome in my life currently. Besides the alcohol bit. The less awesome part of my life is that I did not get into French for the semester and was edged out by a bunch of baby freshmen who have horrible American accents. But I am trying to be less bitter.

At this point, I am rather proud of myself for spelling everything correctly in this post, really.

(Sorry for the side-effects of the tipsy-ness - more coherent life updates later! As in, sometime after I have slept off this lingering lack of sobriety. My life has more depth to it, I simply can't summon it at this moment.)
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feeling: drunktipsy
 
 
jealousy rides with me.
03 June 2010 @ 09:03 pm
Day 01 Your favorite video game
Day 02 Your favorite movie
Day 03 Your favorite television program
Day 04 Your favorite book
Day 05 Your favorite quote

It's not who you love. It's the how and why of it, if what you get is worth what you give up.

- My Heartbeat


Day 06 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 07 A photo that makes you happy
Day 08 A photo that makes you angry/sad
Day 09 A photo you took
Day 10 A photo of you taken over ten years ago
Day 11 A photo of you taken recently
Day 12 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 13 A fictional book
Day 14 A non-fictional book
Day 15 A fanfic
Day 16 A video game scene that makes you cry (or nearly.)
Day 17 An art piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.)
Day 18 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 19 A talent of yours
Day 20 A hobby of yours
Day 21 A recipe
Day 22 A website
Day 23 A YouTube video
Day 24 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 25 Your day, in great detail
Day 26 Your week, in great detail
Day 27 This month, in great detail
Day 28 This year, in great detail
Day 29 Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30 Whatever tickles your fancy
Tags:
 
 
existing at: San Jose airport
feeling: calmcalm
listening: Disney's Hercules - Go the Distance
 
 
 
jealousy rides with me.
01 June 2010 @ 06:02 pm
So I'm waaaay behind on this. Hence, answering more than one!

Day 01 Your favorite video game
Day 02 Your favorite movieCollapse )
Day 03 Your favorite television programCollapse )
Day 04 Your favorite bookCollapse )
Day 05 Your favorite quote
Day 06 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 07 A photo that makes you happy
Day 08 A photo that makes you angry/sad
Day 09 A photo you took
Day 10 A photo of you taken over ten years ago
Day 11 A photo of you taken recently
Day 12 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 13 A fictional book
Day 14 A non-fictional book
Day 15 A fanfic
Day 16 A video game scene that makes you cry (or nearly.)
Day 17 An art piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.)
Day 18 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 19 A talent of yours
Day 20 A hobby of yours
Day 21 A recipe
Day 22 A website
Day 23 A YouTube video
Day 24 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 25 Your day, in great detail
Day 26 Your week, in great detail
Day 27 This month, in great detail
Day 28 This year, in great detail
Day 29 Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30 Whatever tickles your fancy
Tags:
 
 
feeling: okayokay
listening: Black Eyed Peas - Boom Boom Pow
 
 
jealousy rides with me.
22 May 2010 @ 09:55 pm
Meme, stolen from zerodamage. :)

Day 01 Your favorite video gameCollapse )
Day 02 Your favorite movie
Day 03 Your favorite television program
Day 04 Your favorite book
Day 05 Your favorite quote
Day 06 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 07 A photo that makes you happy
Day 08 A photo that makes you angry/sad
Day 09 A photo you took
Day 10 A photo of you taken over ten years ago
Day 11 A photo of you taken recently
Day 12 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 13 A fictional book
Day 14 A non-fictional book
Day 15 A fanfic
Day 16 A video game scene that makes you cry (or nearly.)
Day 17 An art piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.)
Day 18 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 19 A talent of yours
Day 20 A hobby of yours
Day 21 A recipe
Day 22 A website
Day 23 A YouTube video
Day 24 Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 25 Your day, in great detail
Day 26 Your week, in great detail
Day 27 This month, in great detail
Day 28 This year, in great detail
Day 29 Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30 Whatever tickles your fancy
Tags:
 
 
feeling: happyhappy
listening: Life of Brian...
 
 
jealousy rides with me.
22 May 2010 @ 09:34 pm
Done with school, working in a lab, staying in Berkeley with friends. And occasionally kicking it at home in San Jose with my family.

This summer is going to be good. :)
 
 
feeling: cheerfulcheerful
listening: The Script - Breakeven
 
 
jealousy rides with me.
10 May 2010 @ 03:29 pm

Is it bad to say that I could totally see myself doing this? And totally liking it.


Finals week has arrived...one down, three left! If physics doesn't kick my ass I'm going to be a very happy girl Thursday at 2:30.
 
 
feeling: gratefulgrateful
listening: Phoenix - Lisztomania
 
 
jealousy rides with me.
02 March 2010 @ 11:28 am
I would like to live my life, instead of just surviving it.

Unfortunately, I don't think that's a possibility right now.
 
 
feeling: indescribableindescribable